20170921

The inter-connection of the the tribe is much deeper deeper than we normally perceive.

We usually just consider that the leader leads the tribe, and the tribe follows. If the leader does well, the tribe does well.

Yet there is something much deeper happening that we don’t often see.

It is not just about how the leader is, nor is it about the state of the tribe, the reflection of the leader in each member of the tribe, and the reflection of each member in the leader, is far more intertwined.

In fact, if we look closely enough, over a long enough period of time, everything happening within each member of the tribe, every dream, every accomplishment, every fault, every fear and every trauma, plays out in the relationship of the leader to the tribe.

So does every aspect of the leader’s psyche get played out in the tribe’s relationships not just with the leader, but with each other as well.

Indeed, as we all have massive collections of neurons in our brains that collectively add up to make one whole mind, the collection of tribe members add up to be one whole unit that reflects the leader’s soul.

The real question then becomes, did the leader’s presence call the tribe into being, or did the tribe’s being call in the leader’s presence?

And who evolves first? Does the leader grow as the tribe evolves, or does the tribe grow as the leader evolves?

This tight relationship between leader and tribe is always there, regardless of the type of tribe or the type of leader.

Whether we are part of the tribe or whether we are the leader (and we are all both in some aspect), it is our responsibility to evolve and grow and support each other, so the other may evolve and grow and support us as well.

So who is your tribe? Who are you leading? And are you evolving?

20170912

Taking time to remember our ancestors is not something we do for them, it is for ourselves.

Our parents, grandparents, and even great-grandparents all had lives that were lived in very different times, yet their experience, their stories, their lineage all add to the fabric of our own existence.

Did they come from overseas? Did they lose their families in the war? Were they successful or did they work long and hard for not much recognition?

Their DNA is in our bodies. Their names live on in our hearts. Their trauma, their joy and their accomplishments all contributed to who we have become.

By remembering them, reflecting on what they endured and what they celebrated it gives us a stronger foundation upon which to build. We stand on their shoulders and we see greater heights because of what they did. Even the things that they thought were insignificant may have played a big role in shaping who we eventually grew into.

So let’s take some time to remember them, to honor them, and recognize how even if we never met them in person, they have influenced our lives in ways beyond our imagination. Let’s all learn to be a little more grateful for those who came before us.

20170905

There is really only one way to understand the world around us.

Many people have come up with all kinds of theories about why things are the way they are, how things got this way, and what to make of it all.

These ideas can be helpful, yet all we really have to do to understand the world around us is to truly understand ourselves.

Not in a superficial, ego-centered fashion that makes everything all about us.

To understand ourselves in a primal, emotive way, that reveals our deepest fears and our highest aspirations. When we can be truly honest with ourselves about what we desire and what motivates us, them we can begin to see the same desires and motivations being played out before our eyes.

When we admit to ourselves our trauma, our most ferocious fears, and our most terrifying nightmares, then we can begin to tame the violence we see around us within our own heart.

As we come to terms with all of these aspects of ourselves, and more, we begin to come to terms with all the outward manifestations of these energies.

When we find the peace within us, we move through life in peace.

20170829

When we allow others to be who they are, without having to change them or get them to believe what we believe, we actually give ourselves more freedom to be who we are.

What calls to us to change in others is merely a reflection of what we desire to change within ourselves.

It might not seem directly applicable, yet in some way the very things that annoy us about someone else, that irk us about someone else, that cause us to cringe when we think about this other person, are the very same hidden dark corners of our psyche that we feel are untenable.

We usually think it’s all about the other person. It’s not. It’s always about us. If we didn’t have that irritating thorn in our own side that causes us pain when someone else reflects it back to us, then those traits would not annoy us at all.

It is only because those characteristics hit home and ring true within us, that we have a reaction at all.

No, it’s not about them. Yes, it is always about us.

Maybe not directly, maybe not in the same way or about the thing, yet it is there, somewhere, lurking in the recesses of our mind.

Now that we know that, can we be a bit more compassionate for others?

20170822

Control in our lives is something we often strive for, yet in fact it is not attainable.

We think we can control our circumstances, in reality we cannot.

We think we can control other people, in reality we never can.

We think we can control the environment, in reality the environment is much greater and grander than we can imagine.

When it all comes down to it, the only thing we can control is our responses to what life brings and the choices we make.

And in the end, that is the most important control we can have.

20170817

Cleaning House is about much more than just straightening up our living environment.

How we take care of our home, the place we sleep at night and the location of our possessions, is a reflection of something much deeper.

Of course, we “clean house” with much more than our home. We can clean house with our mailing list, our Facebook friends, our desk at the office, and just about anything that accumulates items over time.

So what does it really mean when we Clean House?

It’s actually about our identity, how we see ourselves, and how we feel about ourselves and our life.

Cleaning up and straightening out our environment is symbolic for cleaning up our life, our self-image, our hopes and dreams.

If our home is a chaotic place, chances are our life is chaotic. If our home is messy, chances are our life is messy. If our home is sparkling clean with everything perfectly in it’s place, chances our are life is just as clean and rigid.

Are you feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or lost? Trying cleaning up your home, one corner at a time, and see how much better you feel by the time you finish.

After all, we all deserve a home, a life, that supports our vision and our dreams.

20170815

Learning the rules is important, for many reasons.

When you learn the rules of the game, any game including life, you understand how to interact with people, what’s acceptable, and what’s not.

If you pay attention, you also learn about how the game is structured, what the game is all about, and whether this is a game you want to play or not.

You then learn when to break the rules, bend the rules, or simply ignore the rules. Of course, there are consequences to all three actions, and sometimes that’s just fine.

Ultimately, it’s all about how we show up and learn about ourselves in relation to the rules. Are you a rule follower? A rule Bender? A rule Breaker? Or are you someone who would just rather play another game entirely.

The choice is always yours, if the rules allow it…

20170808

Grief is a part of life.

We grieve when we lose someone. We grieve when when we lose something that is dear to us. It is normal to grieve.

Grief and death are not normally spoken about until we do lose someone. That is something we can change.

We have a tendency to ignore one of the most important aspects of life, the fact that it will one day end. It is as if by ignoring it we feel that we won’t have to deal with it when it does come.

That strategy never really works so well. The time to talk about death and loss is before it happens. To prepare ourselves for that eventuality only serves us to help to deal with it when that day comes.

Death does not have to be feared. Indeed, according to the laws of thermodynamics, energy cannot be created nor destroyed, it merely changes state.

That is what death is, a change of state. The person may be with us physically anymore, yet they can still live on in our hearts, in our memories, and in our spirit.

How we choose to honor them after they pass is up to us. The fact that one day we will all leave this physical existence, no matter how long we extend it, is not.

So let’s learn to celebrate and honor it before it comes knocking on our door.

20170803

Loss is something we all deal with.

Whether it is the loss of a friend, a parent, a loved one, or even a home, we all deal with loss some time in our lives.

The loss itself is not usually the hard part, it tends to happen in an instant, what is the challenge is dealing with the aftermath of the loss.

How do we process the fact that this person is no longer with us? What do we do with all the emotions and pain we feel at the loss of our job, our career, or our marriage?

There is not right or wrong way to deal with loss. There are, however, some perspectives that can help us to move forward and continue in the wake of loss.

First, let us remember that energy is neither created nor destroyed, it merely transforms state.

Second, let us remember that nothing, absolutely nothing, is permanent in the world.

Third, although our external world may continue to constantly change beyond our control, who we are on the inside and how we choose to deal with it, is completely up to us.

Feel like crying, go ahead. Feel like celebrating someone’s life, go ahead. Feel like being alone, go ahead. Feel like being with people, go ahead.

However you choose to deal with loss in your life is up to you. If we choose to celebrate it instead of morn it, perhaps we can gain some insight from the loss.

It is okay to grieve. It is also okay not to feel the need to grieve as well.

20170727

Starting new, destroying the old, recreating our lives is both liberating and painful.

It is painful because we are often attached to how our life is, to the status quo, to the comfort of knowing what we can expect.

It is liberating because we now have a clean slate, a blank canvas on which to create something completely different from what we had before. There are no restrictions, and no guidelines as well.

It is thrilling to begin anew and be limited only by our own imagination. It can also be scary as it is the most uncertain, unknown place to be.

Once the first line is drawn, once we take the first step, we can feel relief. The blankness of the empty canvas can feel daunting and overwhelming. The surest way to get past those stifling feeling is to just take action, do something, create the first little piece.

When we begin, taking that first step, the second step comes easier. As does the third, the fourth, and then we are in the flow. What we once feared dissolves and transforms into the excitement of creation in process.

Every day is an opportunity to see your life as a blank slate. An opportunity to destroy your life and re-create it in any form you desire.

So what do you desire now? What possibilities are you looking to bring into your life?