Sometimes we think we know what another is going through.
Their pain, their suffering.
So we want to help.
To ease another’s agony.
And bring a little more relief to those who so desperately need it.
YET WE DO NOT REALLY KNOW WHAT ANYONE ELSE IS REALLY GOING THROUGH.
We do not know their internal struggles.
Their fears, dread, hopes, and dreams.
And their history is far too detailed and complex to truly grasp all that they are dealing with.
So how can we help?
How can we show up in a way that best serves another person when they are in pain?
THE FIRST AND FOREMOST THING IS TO RECOGNIZE THAT WE DON’T KNOW WHAT IS REALLY GOING ON.
For there is far more about the person that we don’t know than we do know.
And what they are currently dealing with may be far more involved than we imagined.
When we come from a place of humility, then we can truly be with them.
To hold the space for them to be vulnerable with us.
AND SHARE OUR PRESENCE IN A WAY THAT FEELS SUPPORTIVE TO THEM.
Without trying to fix anything.
By not making them right, wrong, or anything in between.
When we truly listen to them without expectation, we can hear them.
Perhaps for the first time.
IN THAT MOMENT OF CONNECTION WE CAN HOLD THEIR PAIN AS IF IT WERE OUR OWN.
We can feel, perhaps just a little, of what it is like to be them.
To see the world from their eyes.
And now we can understand just a little of their experience.
Now we can learn to love them for who they are, and what they have been through.
Not out of pity or obligation.
BUT FROM A PLACE OF EMPATHY AND CONNECTION.
From that place of love and kindness, we will know just what to do.
Just what to say.
And how to hear what they have to say in a way that they truly need from us.
Their pain brings us closer to them.
The shared experience of life brings us all closer together.
ONLY WHEN WE CAN TRULY OPEN OUR EARS AND OUR HEARTS WITHOUT EXPECTATION CAN WE FEEL IT.
And they will feel it as well.
Imagine what the world would be like if we could all do that for each other?
Do you know someone in pain that you need to listen to?
Can you approach them with out expectation and be truly present to them?
~ Sam Liebowitz, The Conscious Consultant
Host of The Conscious Consultant Hour